andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 17, 2024 12:39:17 GMT
If I ever find a pitcher who has heat, a good curve, and a slider, I might seriously consider marrying him, or at least proposing.
Sparky Anderson
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 18, 2024 10:37:27 GMT
Since we're "stuck" at home during the coming heat wave, I thought this situation would become too frequent.
Father's snoring grows to sound increasingly like a vacuum cleaner in heat.
Margaret Halsey
In hot days like the ones coming up, its best to remember Winston Churchill's thoughts on staying hydrated:
The gin and tonic has saved more Englishmen's lives, and minds, than all the doctors in the Empire.
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 19, 2024 9:47:29 GMT
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
Steven Wright
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 20, 2024 14:47:33 GMT
About that heat wave...
Coolness and absence of heat and haste indicate fine qualities.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
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Post by andydp on Jun 21, 2024 12:53:05 GMT
Fear of trying causes paralysis. Trying causes only trembling and sweating.
Mason Cooley
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 22, 2024 10:30:21 GMT
In honor of new "Washer Dryer day":
When a husband says, "I run things in my home" he may mean the washing machine, the dishwasher and the vacuum cleaner.
Sam Ewing
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 23, 2024 10:01:48 GMT
A week filled up with selfishness, and the Sabbath stuffed full of religious exercises, will make a good Pharisee, but a poor Christian.
Henry Ward Beecher
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 24, 2024 12:00:30 GMT
Umpiring is best described as the profession of standing between two seven-year olds with one ice cream cone.
Ron Luciano
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 25, 2024 11:23:28 GMT
Lawn mowing today while the temps and humidity are not "icky"
The fairies break their dances And leave the printed lawn.
A. E. Housman
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jun 26, 2024 10:15:40 GMT
Did lawn mowing and some tree removal yesterday.
Before most people start boasting about their family tree, they already have done a good pruning job.
Orlando Aloysius Battista
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
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Post by andydp on Jun 28, 2024 20:07:56 GMT
Youth is like a long weekend on Friday night. Middle age is like a long weekend on Monday afternoon.
Richard Nelson Bolles
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jun 29, 2024 10:29:40 GMT
We're watching our 12 YO grandson Sunday: Its been a while since we had a teenager (13 in July) around.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
Dorothy Parker
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jun 30, 2024 11:13:15 GMT
Rainy weekend:
I wonder what ants do on rainy days?
Haruki Murakami
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 1, 2024 13:14:24 GMT
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
Tom Bodett
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 2, 2024 9:41:57 GMT
I have a bunch of appointment today starting at 0800.
Events do not just happen, but arrive by appointment.
Epictetus
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 3, 2024 10:32:29 GMT
Meeting people for a "Lobstah" lunch today:
When life gives you lemons, order the lobster tail.
Ziad K. Abdelnour
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 4, 2024 9:54:05 GMT
Happy Fourth everyone !!
Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
Thomas Paine
Ran across this one that summarizes the American experience:
You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.
Erma Bombeck
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jul 5, 2024 10:52:46 GMT
Today marks the 1937 introduction of SPAM to the world. Nine BILLION cans later, Monty Pithon scriptwriters are still using it as a source.
You might be a redneck if, in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.
Jeff Foxworthy
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
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Post by andydp on Jul 6, 2024 11:10:19 GMT
Its hot (and humid) out here in Upstate !!
If heat rises, then heaven must be hotter than hell
Steven Wright
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Post by goldenvalley on Jul 6, 2024 16:09:19 GMT
Its hot (and humid) out here in Upstate !! If heat rises, then heaven must be hotter than hell
Steven Wright Same is true in California right now. 100+ since Tuesday continuing through next week Friday in the inland areas. I'm sitting in a cool 74 on the coast now but will have to return to the furnace in a few days. At least it's a dry heat. |
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andydp
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Post by andydp on Jul 7, 2024 10:35:50 GMT
The weather is like the government, always in the wrong.
Jerome K. Jerome
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 8, 2024 12:34:23 GMT
Being out in the heat for two weeks can definitely drain your energy.
Cobi Jones
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 9, 2024 12:06:35 GMT
More deck cleaning today.
Some of us are like a shovel brigade that follow a parade down Main Street cleaning up.
Donald T. Regan
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 10, 2024 10:02:34 GMT
After yesterday's 100+ heat indices we are now looking forward to the remnants of Beryl to break the weather. Meantime:
Too often man handles life as he does the bad weather. He whiles away the time as he waits for it to stop.
Alfred Polgar
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,012
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Post by andydp on Jul 15, 2024 11:14:47 GMT
Heat, heat and more heat for a couple of days.
Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
Oscar Wilde
Serious note: be careful, stay hydrated, keep an eye on friends and the fur babies.
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