andydp
Tenured Full Professor
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Post by andydp on Jul 14, 2023 12:51:26 GMT
With the weekend coming up, I thought I'd work on future travel plans:
I was in Kashmir last weekend. Went to visit one of my sweaters.
Albert Brooks
Of course, no weekend would be complete without a fire and brimstone speech:
If I do not return to the pulpit this weekend, millions of people will go to hell.**
Jimmy Swaggart
** Not including the mother/daughter tag team. They got a personal absolution.
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 16, 2023 10:51:31 GMT
I don't have a need for finely tuned vocal cords. I'll let Bjork savor her moment of humidity
Seventy per cent humidity is ideal for vocal cords.
Bjork
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 17, 2023 12:54:20 GMT
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Post by indy on Jul 17, 2023 13:20:05 GMT
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson Don't tell Thoreau.
"I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude."
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 18, 2023 12:12:06 GMT
Some people like heat.
If I ever find a pitcher who has heat, a good curve, and a slider, I might seriously consider marrying him, or at least proposing.
Sparky Anderson
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 19, 2023 17:03:39 GMT
In honor of my 74th solar circumnavigation:
Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.
Joey Adams
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 20, 2023 12:30:42 GMT
Doing yard maintenance today. Here's someone familiar with "yard work":
I normally run the 40-yard dash in 4.9, but when a 280-pound guy is chasing me, I run it in 4.6.
John Elway
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pnwguy
Associate Professor
Posts: 1,447
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Post by pnwguy on Jul 20, 2023 13:09:09 GMT
Doing yard maintenance today. Here's someone familiar with "yard work": I normally run the 40-yard dash in 4.9, but when a 280-pound guy is chasing me, I run it in 4.6.
John Elway That applies for zombies too  |
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 21, 2023 12:57:54 GMT
You have to accept the storms and the rainy days and the things in life that you sometimes don't want to face.
Bai Ling
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 22, 2023 12:15:39 GMT
You can't make a cloudy day a sunny day, but can embrace it and decide it's going to be a good day after all.
Jane Lynch
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 23, 2023 16:41:30 GMT
Be pleasant until ten o'clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself.
Elbert Hubbard
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 24, 2023 11:55:58 GMT
Today you are you! That is truer than true!
Dr. Seuss
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 25, 2023 11:10:27 GMT
With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come. And let my liver rather heat with wine, than my heart cool with mortifying groans.
William Shakespeare
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 26, 2023 11:53:10 GMT
Because of pending high heat indexes a heat quote.
Letting off steam always produces more heat than light.
Neal A. Maxwell
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 27, 2023 13:36:50 GMT
Since we have a plumber in the house...
An excellent plumber is infinitely more admirable than an incompetent philosopher.
John W. Gardner
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 28, 2023 11:53:48 GMT
Because of high heat warnings all over the US, a heat quote: **
If you can't take the heat, don't tickle the dragon.
Scott Fahlman
** Joking aside, please be careful and keep an eye on your neighbors.
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 29, 2023 11:14:22 GMT
Finding faults is for those with tired minds.
Rumi
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Jul 31, 2023 11:39:16 GMT
A thought about weekends:
It is good to labor; it is also good to rest from labor.
Horace
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 1, 2023 11:18:47 GMT
Washed the car yesterday. A car wash theme today.
Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.
Dave Barry
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 2, 2023 13:03:14 GMT
We attended the "Happy Together Tour" last night: The Turtles were the signature headliners, but with the voice of the Archies, Ron Dante, again joining Turtles founding member and singer Mark Volman. The rest of the 2023 lineup: Gary Puckett, Little Anthony, the Vogues, the Classics IV and The Cowsills.
In case you're wondering: No mosh pit.
One time we played a concert in Antwerp, Belgium. At least I thought it was Antwerp, Belgium. Turns out it was a Stop 'n Shop in Wisconsin somewhere, but it was fun man.
Slash
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 3, 2023 11:43:05 GMT
Got on a baseball theme today so...
You can sum up the game of baseball in one word: 'You never know.'
Joaquin Andujar
A-Rod wants to be like Babe Ruth. And people don't realize this, he's a lot like Babe Ruth. Before the playoffs a couple of years ago, A-Rod went to the hospital and promised a dying kid he'd ground out to second for him.
Artie Lange
It's no coincidence that female interest in the sport of baseball has increased greatly since the ballplayers swapped those wonderful old-time baggy flannel uniforms for leotards.
Mike Royko
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 4, 2023 11:03:29 GMT
Its Friday or, as we retirees call it: "Saturday #5".
I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling.
Frida Kahlo
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 5, 2023 17:18:39 GMT
We all have these places where shy humiliations gambol on sunny afternoons.
W. H. Auden
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 6, 2023 14:06:02 GMT
Club picnic today.
We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.
Bill Vaughan
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andydp
Tenured Full Professor
Posts: 3,015
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Post by andydp on Aug 7, 2023 12:34:01 GMT
Its Monday and its raining. Someone should write a song about that.
It is best to read the weather forecast before praying for rain.
Mark Twain
Bonus:
Any party which takes credit for the rain must not be surprised if its opponents blame it for the drought.
Dwight Morrow
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